I'm worried about some of you :(

Hey Guys,

Ok first of all I don't want this to sound patronising so please don't take it that way.

I have grown really close to most of you over the last 6/7 weeks and we are like a family on here, that's why I'm so worried about you.

I don't want people to get themselves ill over this. I know it's hard when it's all you can think about 24/7 and it's almost like this whole ordeal is taking over your life. However, think about what Michael would want and focus on the postitives. Like the beautiful music we have been left with until he comes back and how he has brought us all together. Michael wouldn't want us to make ourselves ill or spend hours and hours obsessing about this.

If anyone ever feels the need to chat or get things off their chest just drop me a PM and I will respond as soon as I can.

I love all you guys and gals and don't want to see people on the brink of self descrution

Love and hugs xxx

Thank you for posting this, Honey- its a very good point because so many of us really got absolutly obsessed by this whole thing- i can understand that (i feel the same) but its really not healthy...
and because i truly believe, that Michael is alive i just can say: lets be patient and see what happens- its just important, that we all also consider the possibility, that he might not come back again- whatever he wants, we have to respect that

@ Rachel. I guess one of the people you are talking about is me?? Correct me if im wrong.

Dont worry about me sweetie, I will be fine. Im trying to control it in the best way I can, but its very hard. Im trying to eat, but i dont feel like it, when im sleeping, im wakeing totally affraid, and in panic. Im throwing up alot. Thats why I have seeked counsling. I hope this will help me a bit.

I know thats not what Michael wanted, thats why im trying to control it, in the best way possible.

I love his Music, but these days I cant even listen to it. Everytime, I hear one of his songs in the radio, I have to turn it off, im not watching TV, or reading magazines or anything, because I cant handle it. It Breaks my heart, and im feeling sick.

I dont care if Michael ever comes back to perform. I only care about him beeing happy and safe. I just need to get closure in my heart, that way I will be able to go on with my life, when I know he is safe.


The only way I keep myself from falling completely apart is to keep comming back to this site, and share my feelings with you. Thats what takes me through the day.

Please dont worry about me!!! I dont wanna make you or anybody else upset.

Im gonna send you 1000 og hugs and love.

Helo Rachel, First of all thanks a lot for worrying about us. And yes, we are like a family for the last couple of weeks. I can only speak about myself:
I have been trying to stay away from this site as the fact that nothing else interests me lately is a bit scary. And yes, I am obsessed, addicted and I have not been doing anything else lately then reading these posts and listening to interviews, checking news and trying to do the research my way. And for a while it bothered me... but I realised that I just can not stay away or deal with anything else. It is truly an obsession that I myself dont fully understand, but I already gave in and will see what is at the bottom of this whirlpool and wait until it spits me out (sorry for my english). It broigh me some kind of peace. So thanks to all of you. I appreciate this site more then I could ecplain. I think it does save me in difficult times. Love to you all and thanks again Rachel. You people are all very special and this place on the web just showed me that people can really hold on together.

MyBelovedMJ wrote:@ Rachel. I guess one of the people you are talking about is me?? Correct me if im wrong.

Dont worry about me sweetie, I will be fine. Im trying to control it in the best way I can, but its very hard. Im trying to eat, but i dont feel like it, when im sleeping, im wakeing totally affraid, and in panic. Im throwing up alot. Thats why I have seeked counsling. I hope this will help me a bit.

I know thats not what Michael wanted, thats why im trying to control it, in the best way possible.

I love his Music, but these days I cant even listen to it. Everytime, I hear one of his songs in the radio, I have to turn it off, im not watching TV, or reading magazines or anything, because I cant handle it. It Breaks my heart, and im feeling sick.

The only way I keep myself from falling completely apart is to keep comming back to this site, and share my feelings with you. Thats what takes me through the day.

Please dont worry about me!!! I dont wanna make you or anybody else upset.

Im gonna send you 1000 og hugs and love.

i can totally relate about the music. as much as i love it, i couldn't listen to it for the longest...but it's gotten better now, and in a way i think it's therapeutic to say the least. you should also try it; it may be hard at first, but it may end up helping you

@ yaya. Thanks I will try.

@ MybelovedMJ - Yes Hon you are one of the people I worry about. I can't help it. I think it's in my nature to be a Mother hen lol.

Seriously though, it kills me to see people going through so much pain. When I read your post about not being able to sleep and eat and you keep vomiting I cried my heart out. There is so much sadness and pain in the world right now that we don't need anymore. I understand now more than ever what Michael meant when he said he wanted to "Heal The World". I just want to take all of the pain away from you guys but I can't

I am glad that you are getting some counselling. I think talking to someone who is objective will really help you. I also think it may be a good idea to try and listen to some of Michael's music. I know it will hurt like hell at first but listen to the message behind them and that should bring you comfort.

One of my favourtie Michael songs is "Gone Too Soon" and for the first time since all this happend I listened to it last night because it has been too hard before. I cried my heart out but after that I felt comforted. I know the meaning behind the words and how much Michael worked to try and make the world a better place and I smiled

I promise it will get better for you. Love and hugs xx

Thanks for worrying about us, i have started to become obsessed about the whole thing only because i want answers to what happened that day, I dont think i can rest until i know what really went on that day ive lost alot of sleep over the whole thing and lost my appetite to eat, im emotional drained from all of the medias lies
and BS, Thats why im gonna take a weeks break from here and go on a holiday next week, thanks for caring your a loving person *groupHug* i love all u guys we gotta stick together on this and support eachother

@Rachel. You just did take some of my pain away. You have No idea.

Thanks. I will try to listen to that song, I have to.

Michael would be so proud to see how sweet and carring you are.

You are a true "Mother" in here .

I cant help but loveing you

Hugs

Hi sweet Rachel

You know, i had insomnia BEFORE It's not recent for me, and my doc really take care of me...well he try to do the best he can

I always been very curious and when I want to know something ..it's an obsession ..always..always been

Now, about you ...you know you can PM me too anytime you want. Because I know you don't sleep much and I'm here for you too

Sending love to you all

OMG don't you're going to set me off! I am lstening to "Speechless" by Michael at the moment and it's so beautiful it's making me all emotional!

I'm glad I made you feel a bit better. As I said I didn't want to seem like I was being patronising so I hope it didn't come across like that.

Love to all xx

ok, "speechless" is one i cannot listen to! and "she's out of my life" is borderline. you're very brave, rachel! lol

I love the bit when he's talking at the end of speechless

Rachel wrote:OMG don't you're going to set me off! I am lstening to "Speechless" by Michael at the moment and it's so beautiful it's making me all emotional!

I'm glad I made you feel a bit better. As I said I didn't want to seem like I was being patronising so I hope it didn't come across like that.

Love to all xx

no, you're a sweet caring woman Rachel. I can feel it from here...and we're far Good heart travel through anything

Don't forget yourself my friend ok

"hold my hand" ...for all people here

yaya wrote:ok, "speechless" is one i cannot listen to! and "she's out of my life" is borderline. you're very brave, rachel! lol

Ok I'm sat here crying my eyes out! It makes me come out in goosebumps everytime but for some reason I am drawn to it. I have it on repeat and have listened to it like 50 times!

I can't listen to "She's Out Of My Life" and only just last night listened to "Gone Too Soon" and I bawled like a baby!

@ Human_Nature

Thanks so much for posting that video! I hadn't heard the song before and it's beautiful I think it's just become one of my faves.

Rachel wrote:@ Human_Nature

Thanks so much for posting that video! I hadn't heard the song before and it's beautiful I think it's just become one of my faves.

you're very welcome

and yes, beautiful song

Rachel wrote:

yaya wrote:ok, "speechless" is one i cannot listen to! and "she's out of my life" is borderline. you're very brave, rachel! lol

Ok I'm sat here crying my eyes out! It makes me come out in goosebumps everytime but for some reason I am drawn to it. I have it on repeat and have listened to it like 50 times!

I can't listen to "She's Out Of My Life" and only just last night listened to "Gone Too Soon" and I bawled like a baby!

"gone too soon" is tough! so is "cry"; it's so touching and gives me the chills...but i do have it on repeat
@human nature, that song is beautiful! michael should also sing akon's part, hehe.

Rachel wrote:Hey Guys,

Ok first of all I don't want this to sound patronising so please don't take it that way.

I have grown really close to most of you over the last 6/7 weeks and we are like a family on here, that's why I'm so worried about you.

I don't want people to get themselves ill over this. I know it's hard when it's all you can think about 24/7 and it's almost like this whole ordeal is taking over your life. However, think about what Michael would want and focus on the postitives. Like the beautiful music we have been left with until he comes back and how he has brought us all together. Michael wouldn't want us to make ourselves ill or spend hours and hours obsessing about this.

If anyone ever feels the need to chat or get things off their chest just drop me a PM and I will respond as soon as I can.

I love all you guys and gals and don't want to see people on the brink of self descrution

Love and hugs xxx

Thank you sweetie. I love you too. But dont be worried about me. I am ok, I am positive. However, I know what are you talking about. I cannot deny that Michael's missing changed me radically.I fall into a deep state of apathy, irritation and for 2 weeks I was very ill. I am ok now.. I think.. I didnt recover completely but I hope that someday I will. I know that there's the risk that I might never find the truth but even so I am positive. I do want to see Michael again, well and happy, and I want to see you guys as well.Thank you Rach, and thank you all. I owe you everything.

I did it Rachel, I listen to this song. Its the first time since Michael "died" I have been listening to one of his songs. You were right, It did hurt like hell, and i threw up again.

I was crying my heart out, I felt like It just broke into peices. But I did it.

OH MY GOD.

Why did I listen to it. I regret that now.

You are so Kind Rachel! and many others here too! You can feel the closeness of the people here. I always say out of every negative thing that happens, something positive always comes through. The one positive thing that has come out of all this is how people on these forums have come together to help each other. I am so sure Michael would be proud, it's what he would want.

It is so hard, I still cannot believe how many tears I have cried and how much it has effected me. All I want is solid truthful answers, and we just don't get them, it's so hard.

But as I have said before, although it is difficult, we must remain positive, I believe positive thoughts can create amazing things!!!

Lots and Love and great big hugs to you all,

Charlie xxx

Shes out of my life makes me bawl my eyes out cause it makes me think of my sister who died 3 years ago in a car crash that was a very hard time for me michaels music helped me through it, u guys are making me sad again

SmoothCriminal wrote:Shes out of my life makes me bawl my eyes out cause it makes me think of my sister who died 3 years ago in a car crash that was a very hard time for me michaels music helped me through it, u guys are making me sad again

Oh god I'm so sorry to hear that and I'm sorry if we are making you feel sad. It meant to start as a feel good thread lol.

I just have to start out with. I love you all from the bottom of my heart. You all here and over on MJHD have become more of a family to me since all this started. My family doesn't even like to talk to me anymore because all I do is go to work and then come to this site. People at my work think I'm sick because of the weight I have lost. They don't understand why I just don't get over it. It's not that I don't want to. I can't. I need to know the truth, as do we all. I do sleep, but when I do its a restless sleep and all I do is dream of Michael. I too wake up during the night panicked and afraid, sometimes I even wake up crying. I just want to thank you all, because if not for all of you I'm not sure how I would make it through without all of your support ,faith, and kind words. Thank you.

Rachel wrote:

SmoothCriminal wrote:Shes out of my life makes me bawl my eyes out cause it makes me think of my sister who died 3 years ago in a car crash that was a very hard time for me michaels music helped me through it, u guys are making me sad again

Oh god I'm so sorry to hear that and I'm sorry if we are making you feel sad. It meant to start as a feel good thread lol.

Thanks no need to apologise its just that song hits me really hard I think im gonna listen to some billie jean to cheer me up and get an early night for once night everyone stay positive

I admit that I sleep not enough to do my work properly - so I leave for today and get some more...good n8

charmed6 wrote:I just have to start out with. I love you all from the bottom of my heart. You all here and over on MJHD have become more of a family to me since all this started. My family doesn't even like to talk to me anymore because all I do is go to work and then come to this site. People at my work think I'm sick because of the weight I have lost. They don't understand why I just don't get over it. It's not that I don't want to. I can't. I need to know the truth, as do we all. I do sleep, but when I do its a restless sleep and all I do is dream of Michael. I too wake up during the night panicked and afraid, sometimes I even wake up crying. I just want to thank you all, because if not for all of you I'm not sure how I would make it through without all of your support ,faith, and kind words. Thank you.

Honey. We will NEVER get over this. But someday we will find away to learn how to live with it. Even though it breaks our hearts. We have to. But that dosent mean that I will EVER let Michael go. I cant, I have my reasons for that. Letting him go, will be like loosing him for good

Read some of my posts, and you will see that you and I are alike.

Im here if you need me.

since I heard that Michael died, sine I discovered this site and MJHD I did not sleep at all, no eating, no peace if I am not here to see what it finds. I know I haven`t posted a lot (because I`m not very good at writing in English, I get better at reading and speaking).
my boyfriend told me that leaves me if I not give up this obsession.
I can not quit.
have to see what happens,
"don `t walk away" is my favorite song, cry a lot when I listen